Crazy on Crochetting!!

Hello internet.. yes it's been a while im dissapear from the blog life.. you know why? because im trying to install instagram on my android but it failed... so i got this outdated idea to do sales and marketing in my blog since the usage is quite the same...

So yeah! like u can read on the title above.. i started to liking crocheting so much.. maybe because im a home-maker right now.. so by using the skills that i gained learning crochetting, i build my own business.. even tho its just a small one.. but im very happy with the outcome.

so guys!!!

Kindly visit the link to go straight to my FB Page.

Please click here---->>>  Beanies & Me where i do sell HAND & CUSTOME-MADE CROCHET BEANIES HAT ant etc.. the price is soooo cheap! Let me gimme you guys some of the samples picture from the album... So, if you're interested, please please please do LIKE MY FB PAGE! PM / Whatsapp at 010-2646791...

Life after Marriage.. Unbalanced Hormon? Pregnant?

Okay, before we go further on this topic i would like to say that i'm a plus size model. Seriously guys i am!.. Yeah hana.. only in your dream-AHA~~ Yeah i was like 5" 7" / 175cm tall with the weight of 95 kgs. I was overweight according to the BMI calculator. Well i have the up side down of those yoyo diet. I still can remember when i was in high-school, i really wanted to loose weight. Then i decided to not eat rice which my body is expected to have everyday. I go to school by school van and later after finish my classes i went back home by walking around 3 km straight to my house. So i started to not eat rice, but i still consume fried fish/chicken and lots of veggies but in a very small portion. I started feeling dizzy and so cold. I even collapse if especially when i change position from sitting on the floor and get up to stand on my feet. I'm not sure why, but there was a time when my mom sees that happen in front of her when i try to stand up to open the doors lock cause my dad is home. My mom just like, saying "What's wrong?". I would just smile. So that shows how i really wanted badly to be skinny. But the best thing is when all my teachers realized the differences and asking me why do i look like i'm getting slimmer and all that. Only God knows how happy i was. But you know, i'm not really that discipline type of people. After finish high school, i'm gaining back those kilos and i have been struggling since that with the yoyo diet syndrome.

So let's go back with my life after marriage. Since i have been gaining and losing my weight, i have problems with my period (menstruation). Well before marriage i do get my period every months. But sometimes i don't get it. I notice this happens when i gain a lot of weight. There's a time when i don't get it like in 5 months. But then after i did some exercises and eat well, suddenly i will get my period back. That's was so strange. Before getting married, i been having my period like a normal person but after marriage, my period was so out of ordinary. And after 5 months of marriage we decided to plan of having a baby and i have been having those pregnancy symptoms but when i test, the result was always negative. There were a times when i got this brown spotting and brown discharges (web look like-i'm not sure if i had a miscarriage or what) and after that constant red blood spotting for about 2 months and i was like freaking out the whole time. But the test always shows negative. I did went to the doctor, and like the same old advice "you gotta lost some weight" and what surprises me more is that i get my period at the same time and it was like so many blood and i tell my husband that i wanna go home immediately. But i need to see the doctor first to see whether she could give me some medicine or something. She prescribe me an EPO (Evening Primrose Oil). So i buy that EPO at Cosway Pharmacy. I take those like every night but i see no differences so i stopped. Now my period will only come like once in a 2 months. So it's pretty hard for us to have a baby :( cause i don't know when did i ovulate... or did i even ovulate? We have been married like 1 year but i still believe that GOD has plan for us. What we gotta do is to never stop trying. I have been slowly change our diet like eating more fruits and veggies and do some exercise a bit. Then if i'm not in the mood for eating, i can just go for fasting for the whole day. Yeah just hoping that my husband and i can feel and experience of having our own child in the future :) no pressure ya!

How I First Met My Husband :)

So let me tell you something about how i met my husband. Its kinda funny since it was all started out in MYSPACE. We both still studying for our diploma. And one night, i felt so bored since my bestfriend was not around. And if i'm not mistaken, that time was like on valentines day. Just FYI, i never celebrate that kinda day :P.... So i went to the internet cafe. Open my myspace, reading all the private messages which i haven't open for quite some time. And there he was... he just message me like " hi, can i get to know you?" (in malays- hi, boleh kenal?) something like that. Then i started to stalk his page. Scanning all his photo and bio, because i was so afraid if this person does not exist and scammers were pretty a lot at that time.And my thoughts about his looks was "Hmmm... not bad" (in Malays- Hmmmm boleh tahan gak mamat nih).. hehehe.. then we start to communicate and shares our contact numbers and all. He was so brave that he calls me rigth away at the same night by using his parent's landline. At first when i heard his voice, it sounded very good, and i was kept thinking about the people who says that if a person's voice sounds good over a phone, it might indicates that he/she is not so good looking. So in that time i was like freaking out when he ask me to see him. But i'm also a one brave big girl. So we set a date and he will be coming over to Bolton by his scooter vs125 and i will meet him from there as i lived like 10 minutes away from my rented house. Of course i'm nervous. Keep thinking of that superstitions but i made it. I ask him to wait in front of the 7-Eleven and there he was.. I was actually hiding for a while because i am so afraid of the way he looks. He seems so matured and scary ( i donno why i felt scared eventho he doesn't look like scary at all). But i dont want to leave him just like that and its all about courtesy. So i ride my scooter karisma and went to his spot. HAHAHAHAHA... We both smiling and keep saying hi over again as we both are very deeply, madly nervous. Then i ask him to leave his scooter at my house and after that we watched movies at KLCC. I can't remember the movie, but Drew Barrymore was starring in it.... Oh yeah! the movie was called MUSIC and LYRICS. And we have a very good date and that is our first movie together. so on the next day he propose me to be his soulmate.. that was the greatest day of my life.. Even thow i juz broke up with sumone, but i never closed my heart for another guy.. coz everything happens for a reason and i believe in that.. which is more better than before.. so in this life i never stop myself from doing wrong and keep on learning new things and learnt from it.. it may be GOOD and Bad.. but try to think it positively... i feel so blessed to have him as my soulmate.. he accept me for whatever i am past and present.. he never breaks my heart.. he gimme all the love in the world that sometimes i feel i dun deserve it..he sacrifices a lot for me..all the ups and down.. i never felt lonely.. and i can't imagine how am i goin to live without him by my side.. he was the first man who always keep on saying the I LOVE YOU words to me.. i mean, there's so much love he wanna share.. and i think dat i cud never find it in any other guys out there.. And now we are happily married with one and another. I knew he was the one for me. Because i have this some sort of the ability to look into a person in a very different perspectives. People keep saying or asking why i choose him? Mostly from my degree classmate and i would just reply to all of that by saying "because i loved him very much". But deep down i'm feeling very sad to have friends who keep asking without thinking " is it really appropriate to ask her this questions?" , "Will this words hurts her feeling?". I don't really know what is the problem that they were having with my relationship with my babe??, just didn't understand was it really matter of you all to ask me that question? , are you guys being very "caring" or just wanted to compare with what i got and what you not?.. Come on guys.. you are too "busy" minding others business. Take a mirror and look at yourself.. are you happy with your life right now? Because i know I AM HAPPY :) and thats all really matters. So that's it.. and um.. theres a lot of thing that i wanted to share in the past with you all readers, but i might writing it wrongly as i have this disease called short term memory.. it was all blurry but i knew it ever happens to me.. hahaha.. so maybe i write something which is much more in presents huh? Whatcha guys think? Kindly leave a comment below :)

LOVE-FRUSTRATION-LOVE AGAIN AND AGAIN

I fell in love for the first time wen i was 18.. i was so naive.. i know nothing.. i thought that it'll end up with a wedding gown but unfortunately it didn't.. at first he seems so nice, so caring, but later then he became like strangers to me.. he get mad after he knew that i went hangout with my boy-mates.. then i try to explain it to him, but he seem like he can't accept that n made his own decision to leave me just like that... i was wondering how easy he can throw me away from his life without knowing the truth.. i was so in love with him in that time but, what could i do?? i try to save the love we had.. but the saddest part is he asked his friend to call me and start mocking me saying that i'm a bitch, a whore, a slut what else? she's yelling to me like i was stealing her boyfriend, keep on warning me to stay away from HIM.. automatically i cried while hearing that on the phone.. i was in the college in that moment.. i cried in front of fiza.. coz he was like THE LOVE OF MY LIFE.. i just can't imagine living my life without him.. i try to forget all the memories.. but each time i try.. i cry.. because he was the first guy i fell in love to... but thanx to my friends who tried to cheer me up... i loved you guys.. and i will never forget what you all have done for me.. even its as small as fungus.. i really appreciated it.. n thats how--> i have my first love...

AS I GREW UP - teenage world

High school was the best part of my life... i love my school n my wacko old friends.... high school remind me of those concert, clubs that i organize.. event that i participate... i really miss those stuff... cause i conquer all those part n make it like its all mine... i just love to get those attention.. n support from the people around me.. just feel like i was a star back then.. haha.. makes me smile whenever i think about it back.. keep it nicely all in my head n memory...the other part of the brain.. i'm so active back then but its really different wen i stepped into the higher level of education... its not really that motivated n less in passion.. so i just let it blew away..


I can still remember the BBQ / REUNION PARTY (i was in form 3 that time) which was held at my house.. i was the organizer for that day.. they all choose my house because it looks so creepy.. i didn't have the photo rite now.. but i'll put it in this column rite after i got one.. so the party gone smoothly as i expected from night until the next morning..we all having so much fun.. so many games that we play.. i really miss those moment.. the camping things, the concerts n gigs, the hangouts.. i missed to be naughty again... wish that i cud turn back time~~

ITS JUST ONLY ME - confession of a lonely girl (Growing up)

This blog will be in dual language (English-Malay) as i'm not really good in English and hope that it can be understand and also for my part, i will do my best to write it in English. My name is Hana. By the time i'm writing this blog my age was 27 years and 7 months. I'm a graduate of Bach. Deg. Hons. Eng. Tech. in Business Management from UniKL-IPROM. I have been working with several international and local company ( 4 chinese and 2 malay - these including my industrial training period). Well now, i'm a house wive. I do some online business. I know it's pretty new, and small market but if i believe in myself these thing can go further. And the best thing is that i don't have to face those "sick" people/bosses in the office. hehehe.. But i do still applying jobs but for this time around i only ACCEPT for the big company. My husband says " it's okay, i will not pressure you to look for a job. i just want you to feel the experience of working with a big companies and not like your previous cold-hearted bosses". Well, yeah.. i guess i have no luck yet.. but still hoping for that kinda experience.

Grew up in a family with mostly conquer by boys.. i couldn't shape myself to be true lady... sometimes i feel lost... most of the childhood times.. just be only me and my dolls.. left there playing alone by myself.. my mom working, so everyday after got back from school, i got no one to talk with.. so that situation creates n shapes what i am now.. unfriendly and always fly-high in my own world.. i got imaginary friend, but i forgot their names.. so each times i feel like i wanna talk to someone.. i'll talk to them.. they know how to treat me n they treat me well enough.. sometimes i get fight with my mom, well that was wen i was still young.. i don't know what am i thinking back then.. i'm just tired being the only girl in the family.. i want a sister- a big or small sister.. i dun mind but that hopes never been heard by anyone... cause i keep it to myself... i used to hate my parent so much.. you know those teenage-blood.. but as i grew up i learnt that family comes first.. and then i realizes how much my parent have been sacrifices for me n other siblings.. i cried.. and starting from that moment.. i'll never ever gonna forget them, not till i die.. i promise to myself one day when i become rich.. i let them travel all around the world, staying in a 5 star hotels, enjoying those golden years with pleasure... One fine day..